About two weeks ago, I had to say goodbye to my favorite furry companion, Ella – my pug. It was difficult to process that she was tired and her small body and spirit was ready to cross over the rainbow bridge or whatever you call it and be with her sisters (Laura and Lindy) and my deceased husband, Robin. Her passing did not come as a shock as she had been on the decline physically, but I must admit, this little 18-pound dog filled up my house with joy and now it feels quite empty and different. In addition, I found myself dealing with a flood of emotions that I did not anticipate. Obviously, I missed her and just wanted to know she was ok on the other side, but her passing knocked the wind out of my sails. I finally had to come to terms with the transitions about to occur in my life. This includes that she was the last link (besides Isabelle of course) to my previous life with Robin. I suppose over the years, I put much of my emotions and realities aside because I had a dog to take care of  and she filled my love cup. But unfortunately, I avoided becoming an empty nester and did not form a plan for my next steps, I was kind of just going with the flow.   Grief sucks but I have decided to sit in it, be with it and be comfortable being uncomfortable. Although I am sad and miss my  Ella, it is important to acknowledge the time alone, honor her for being the best companion a girl could ask for and also figuring out how to make the most of the future and my path forward. This is not the greatest moment for me, but it has opened up perspective and allowed me to take a pause as I think about 2025 and what is next…. But before I go there, I must at least write a paragraph about my Ella Bella and what a wonderful girl she was…

Almost thirteen years ago, our family adopted three pugs which I fell instantly in love with from the moment I saw their little faces. Because there were three of us, Robin, Isabelle, and me – we each had a signature pug as we called it. Robin’s dog was Lindy, mine was Laura and Isabelle took on our youngest pug Ella. Times started out rocky in Harrisburg, PA with them as having three pugs was a big commitment which was not entirely thought through (the ultimate impulse buy 😊). The girls did not have the best previous lives and had never even walked on a leash. We learned the hard way with cute but ill-fitting harnesses and when they got spooked, Laura and Ella bolted down the street (Lindy was always the smartest one – she stayed with us – knew she had hit the lottery). Isabelle and Robin chased after them until they were secured. Laura gave up without a fight, but Ella had gotten especially scared, and we thought we lost her for good. However, Robin was determined to continue to look for her into the night where he brought our scared little puppy home. We were so relieved and realized it was time to ensure better walking gear (form over style) and more structure. Ella was full of energy, loved her walks, barking, terrible at learning commands and snuggling with her sister Laura. As a side note, Robin and Isabelle believed Ella was actually Laura’s daughter – we never did solve that mystery. Unfortunately, over the years Lindy and then Laura passed away leaving Ella as my sole pug for about three years as Isabelle was off to school and globetrotting around the world. Ella too aged over the years still maintaining her rambunctious spirit, but her back legs became weak making it difficult to walk. She loved being outside and frolicking in the leaves and grass. She also loved flirting with random service professionals such as plumbers, electricians, and the cable guy. For the last year and half, Ella and I would clock about five miles daily as I held her in my arms and put her down in strategic places for her to sniff and do her business. I was that nutty woman in the neighborhood that held my dog and people would say things like I wonder who is walking who? It never let up – everyone thought they were very original when they said that to me, but I did not care. It was our time together, almost spiritual, where we just enjoyed the quiet and nature. We would come home, and she would demand her cookies and greenies. As she got older, she became finicky and would not eat dog food. I guess all of us old ladies start having that – FUCK It moment where we do what we wanted to do. She would be fed turkey, sweet potato and broasted chicken. There were even times when she was sick of the menu, and I would DoorDash brisket or another meal from the deli. I am not proud, but I felt like she deserved her YOLO moments. We enjoyed our day naps and sacking out on the couch. I loved massaging her legs and doing reiki healing for her too (OK – I guess I have proven that I am strange as I revealed way too much). The truth is that it was an honor to care for her and make sure that she was content. It was peaceful with her; she made me feel calm and purposeful. I was not able to travel too much or be away for more than a few hours, but I knew that this was only a moment in time, and I was happy to stay close. All and all, she hung on as long as she could and wanted to ensure that I would be ok without her.  It was a beautiful relationship that I will always cherish. RIP my little pumpkin. As I think about the future, the hope is coming back, and the possibilities are beginning to run through my head. I decided I am going to be more spontaneous and travel. I have already booked a trip to visit Isabelle over the holidays in DC.  I can be present, enjoy the city and all it has to offer without worrying about Ella. I am going to take this phase to continue my health journey and set new goals for myself (will tell you about my status in the next blog). I found this great quote which perfectly describes where I am now. “Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it is about learning to dance in the rain.” So if you do not mind, I need to grab my boots and umbrella and be grateful for the possibilities in front of me.  Wishing everyone a Happy Thanksgiving.

I had been really excited to write this post in anticipation of reporting out the findings from my annual physical. I wanted to share with the world the miraculous results based on my healthy lifestyle changes. I trotted into the doctor’s office feeling super confident and ready to impress. The visit started out strong as the medical technician did not choose to put me on the scale instead just asked me how much I weighed (that was a first – never knew you get skinny perks – haha). Another technician came in to perform an EKG and she could not believe that I was 58 (High 5- woo hoo). I met my new doctor, and I shared my goals, concerns and it seemed like everything was going perfectly as planned. I was sent to another office to take my blood, and I was feeling GOOD with a little pep in my step.

And then… the results came in…. To my shock, my cholesterol was high (which has not been an issue in the past for me), LDL borderline higher and my thyroid was off. Cue music – wah wah wah…  Ugh, you have to be kidding me – how did I get this wrong. I had recently learned that women who are post menopause suffer from cholesterol issues due to lower estrogen production, but I am supposed to be the pillar of health – so I thought. My endocrinologist shared that with weight loss, medication for the thyroid needs to be adjusted and can contribute to throwing off cholesterol and LDL. Both doctors agreed to get a recheck in two months and see if things change.

Meanwhile back at the farm (otherwise known as my house),  I reflected and absolutely knew I was eating better. However, I had gotten a little sloppy with my food choices and it was time to reign it in a bit. I am a pescatarian (fish and dairy) and have been eating a lot of vegetables too but still had some harmful stuff in my diet. I decided to go to my bookshelf and refer to the OG of health, Dr. Joel Fuhrman. He has preached a nutritarian lifestyle consisting of nutrient dense foods such as vegetables, nuts, seeds, and legumes. He is research and data-based in his approach helping thousands of people escape heart issues, obesity, cancer, and all other life diminishing diseases. He has authored multiple books with a medical practice and health center. I have known about him for years but always considered this way of living for people who were extremely sick. It kind of felt extreme to me in the past but this time something clicked. As I learn more about food and nutrition, I think with a few tweaks, I can align my eating to produce better overall health results.

Basically, the nutritarian philosophy focuses on GBOMBS (Greens, Beans, Onions, Mushrooms Berries, Seeds and Nuts).  These are super foods and when combined in a strategic way, they help build protection in your system, promote health and weight loss to the correct set-point (healthiest weight for you naturally). These foods are dense with nutrients and fiber that enter your system in a slower and methodical way to fuel the body and optimize its function. You feel fuller, satisfied, and don’t have to monitor the amount of food you eat. Coupling this methodology with time restricted eating, which encourages the last meal to be completed four hours before you go to bed supports the body to digest the food, better sleep which in turn naturally helps you lose weight and be healthier.

Now, you may say this sounds horrible and I felt the same way. But in the last year, I have retrained my taste buds where I actually like vegetables, beans, and fruit better than processed. Foods now taste too salty or sweet for me, they have an artificial taste that is not appealing as much. I guess the bottom line is that this is a journey and changing your preferences does not happen overnight. As I have gotten older, my body is sensitive and when I eat packaged food not in the purest form – I feel it and not in a good way.

So… I have taken the last few weeks to educate myself, restock the kitchen and learn how to cook these recipes (thank g-d I have a chef as a boyfriend – he has been a real champ and doesn’t mind chopping tons of veggies). I completed my first week with about 80% compliance and I think I am getting the swing of things and can already feel some difference (let’s just say the colon is seeing a little more action 😊). Wish me luck and I will report my progress. My hope is to knock off the last 5 pounds and bring my blood work inline. Most of all, trying to Benjamin Button myself to live a longer and happier life in order to torment my daughter Isabelle by never leaving – ha-ha. BTW – Dr. Fuhrman says people should live to 97 – 107 years old. Not sure I want to be that ambitious … but what the hell – it is a good “North Star.” Till next month …

Last weekend my best friend, Marla,  flew in from Atlanta to attend her 40^th High School Reunion. Since I had grown up with her and knew many of the people who may be there, I thought it would be fun to be her date at this soiree. With this event coming up it encouraged me to think about wellness and the importance of my early experiences, friends, and how it has shaped my future.

I grew up in Oak Park, Michigan and we lived in a subdivision called the “Manor.”  Times were carefree back in the 70’s as there were no cell phones, social media, or much organized activities. Most afternoons and weekends were spent hopping on our bikes and going to play with friends. We would meet up on the street and start a game of kickball, dodgeball, or any other outdoor antics. Marla lived across the street and sometimes when we felt adventurous, we would ride our bikes to the drug store for a day outing. We knew that when it started getting dark, it was time to come home. We had a crew of buddies in the subdivision and grew up together with an ease and laissez faire mentality to our relationships. I never recall having any problems of not being included in whatever was happening – it was just understood “we were all in” or at least that is how I remember it!

One of my fondest memories was Halloween in the “Manor.” Everyone dressed up and our neighbors opened their garage to the best party ever. We would go there and eat popcorn, candy apples, and grab our UNICEF containers to collect for charity. We always had great costumes (thanks to Mr. Peiss); we would walk around in cardboard over our winter coats. It was never extremely comfortable but we looked damn cute. One year Marla and I went as M&M’s, and we had to stick together all night to ensure the full effect was achieved. It was also a  ritual after collecting our sack of candy for our parents to sort through our goodies discarding fruit, unwrapped items or anything that looked suspicious. Our biggest concern at the time was razors. Not sure that was a real threat – but hey – no ill intent was ever found (unless you consider Circus Peanuts which was a total violation to me – so gross). I spent a lot of time as a child wondering why someone would choose that as the treats to give (same thoughts why households gave fruit or pencils – I am sure everyone threw those out during the parental candy review). This is the type of deep thinking that still burdens me today 😊.

Several years ago,  Marla and I were reminiscing about the good old days. We corroborated stories on how we MAY have almost been abducted by the Birmingham child killer. The details are fuzzy but it did involve a weird guy driving a Gremlin. We confirmed that we remember being approached and we took off with a huge “stranger danger” alarm system going off in our heads. Always fun time – yikes (BTW we had no idea during that time that this guy was out kidnapping). Ignorance was bliss and that is how we lived our life. As our neighborhood friends grew up, we also enjoyed our curiosity in becoming teenagers with those basement parties of spin the bottle and making out in the closet. We had no idea what we were doing but it was all innocent coming of age antics.

As I remember these moments warmly, my parents were a bit more concerned and decided it was time to move. Partly because my father had remarried (my mom had died) and my stepmom (who I loved) wanted to start their lives in a new home purchased as a couple. That was a pretty reasonable request and they thought it was time for me to attend a better school system that would challenge me. So, with all of that, we moved to Farmington Hills, Michigan and I was positioned to be a freshman at a new high school.  I never quite fit in (or tried that much… to get involved if I were being honest) as my new neighborhood and friends were different. What used to be easy and seamless was now hard. I did not have my core buddies and I guess I just felt lost. Needless to say, I had some tough life lessons, adapted, and figured things out. However, I always had a fondness for Oak Park and the memories of living in the “Manor.”  I just expected that Marla continued to experience the bliss and I was no longer part of that anymore. 

Fast forward to Oak Park High 40^th Reunion and immersing ourselves back to  elementary and middle school times. I was not sure who was attending and just hoped (as did Marla) that we would know some people when we entered the banquet hall. Now, this was the first time that both Marla or I attended a reunion and I was not sure anyone would remember me. I was surprised that Marla (who stayed) never felt completely attached to her high school. I thought she would have some confidence since she went to school with everyone longer than I did. But as she described, when I left, everyone outgrew playtime, went their own ways and things were not quite that “Manor” chumminess we had as kids anymore. I never realized that my move made her feel like she was abandoned in Oak Park by me. In my defense,  I was caught up in my own changes and had little influence on my parents’ decisions to sell the house. It’s embarrassing that I have thought long and hard about unimportant moments like the Halloween candy offerings of my neighbors… and not one consideration on the impact of our move on Marla. Not a proud moment but that is why I blog – free therapy and growth!!!

The weekend festivities began with breakfast followed by a trip to Oak Park High School and its planetarium (thank you Robbie D. for setting that up). Marla and I walked into the restaurant and were greeted by our childhood friends Dena and Stephanie who grew up in the “Manor” too and were the staples of our lives. We reminisced about those times and just laughed. Even though we had not seen each other in (30+ years), it was like we were kids again. After breakfast, we headed to Oak Park High School where I took pictures of Marla at her locker (technically she could not remember – so we went with one that could have been it) – I mean who was going to challenge the authenticity of the picture?? We then went to the planetarium. It looked exactly the same but smaller, a little worn and the seats were snugger for our grown-up bodies. We were taken through an updated galaxy experience using their modern technology while honoring our history with some old school pictures. It was so fun!!! After that, Marla and I decided to go back to my house and take a long day nap to get ready for our big night. Yes, no primping and prepping – just a good snooze.

When we walked into the party, we were transported to1984. There were cute centerpieces and favorite food stations representing “lunch hot spots” like Davison Coney Island, Burger Chef, and a Chinese Restaurant (name escapes me). The DJ played songs from our times growing up and I especially liked Grand Master Flash, Sugar Hill Gang, Prince and Run DMC. One of our fears was quickly realized as we knew less people than we hoped and suffered through some polite but distant hellos and awkward chit chat. I saw my friends from the” Manor” like Jimmy, Ronald, Dena, Stephanie and then friends that came later in my life like Laurie, Lee, Paula etc. I saw a friend that I used to play with in 6^th grade and she had no clue who I was – UNCOMFORTABLE … 😳. And to make matters worse, I actually ran up to a guy that I thought was my childhood pal, gave him a huge hug (not like a socially appropriate hug) and he gladly reciprocated. He looked familiar but did not have the essence I remember. But you know that the years can take a toll on your appearance and demeanor sometimes. I shared with my friend Dena how nice it was to see Donald and she corrected me that he was not actually at the reunion. I pointed to who I hugged, and she burst out in laughter telling me that was in fact someone else. I was really embarrassed but Juan (the person I embraced – apparently his name) did not seem phased. So, either he played along, thought he should know me or was super high. When I saw my friend Ronald, who arrived late (and the twin of Donald), he cracked up and did not seem surprised. I guess some things don’t change including those reoccurring whoopsies. We got a chuckle, and I avoided Juan the rest of the night.

I was so interested in learning about everyone’s life – who they had become, married, families etc… We all agreed that we could not believe it had been 40 years since we graduated but yet we all did kind of act old. Barely anyone was dancing even though the music was great, we complained how loud it was and many of the discussions revolved around our ailments or grandchildren (yikes). Some teachers showed up too, which was cool. The most awkward portion of the night (more than the intimate hug to Juan) came from the former physical education teacher that kicked her leg up and did the splits in a straight skirt and heels (and there was no shame when we got a glimpse of her crotch). Whatever… that is how it goes when we are all trying to prove that we are still young.

Needless to say, it was a really fun trip down memory lane. Even though many of us had not seen each other for multiple decades, we naturally picked up from where we left off and had a childhood affection for one another. It was nice to have that eternal bond that withstood the test of time. Although my friends went their own way and created lives that were extremely different – we had a shared foundation because we started in the same place.

The day after, Marla and I replayed the weekend events to one another. I learned things about how she felt that I never knew before and it strengthened our bond. We had a wonderful time but could also agree it filled our nostalgia cup. There was no need for anymore Oak Park get-togethers in the near future for us  (but we do have another 10 years to make that call).

As I reflect, I always wondered what would have happened if I never moved and stayed in Oak Park. I almost glamorized our childhood connections and that I somehow missed out. The truth of the matter is my life plan was that I was supposed to move. Marla’s course was to remain in Oak Park, and she made new friends as did the rest of our crew. Our childhood was a moment in time that was precious in all our minds. However, we all had our own paths that led each one of us in different directions. It was great reconnecting and re-meeting our friends as adults, fathers, mothers, grandparents etc. I am glad to see that everyone was doing well and proud of who they have become. We are all grateful (at least I am) that I was able to share my core years with a notable set of individuals who seem joyful and equally appreciative of the roles we played in each other’s lives. I would say that was a successful reunion and a moment I will always cherish. Also… so nice meeting you Juan 😊.

I am not a stranger to difficult life lessons and challenges. I have lost three parents, two brothers, two sister-in laws (who I considered my sisters) and a husband. It has not been easy to find balance and peace with these profound voids in my life. And to top it off, our world does not seem to be in the best place either. We are divided politically, experience natural disasters, pandemics, war and feeling a communal apathy… it’s been a lot!!!  I am not sure I would have found grounding had I not begun to explore spirituality. This is not a religion, more a belief system that we are all connected to one another and source. We are all energy and we were put in these shells called bodies to learn what it is like to be human with free will. I find it comforting that my deceased loved ones are with me and feel their presence every day. With that being said, a sense of alignment to the universe provides a level of wellness and health that can be uplifting and give hope and motivation to move forward even in tough times.

Now I am not going to get preachy because everyone believes what they believe. I can only share that there are so many “whispers” that happen in our life and sometimes we should pause and say “hmm…  I have always felt that there was a connectivity to those who passed but it became much stronger when Robin (my husband) died. Smoke detectors were going off for no reason, the dogs were barking like they saw something, tons of robins started showing up .  It was undeniable that I was receiving some sort of message and I had to pursue it. I went to mediums for readings (people who can communicate with the  deceased) and I received specific information that would never be known through research on the web to provide validity to the thoughts being delivered . It was important for me to know that Robin was at peace and most of all,  I was not losing my mind (both were affirmed – at least for that brief period of time). Going through great despair, I sought solace with nature and still do today. It is relaxing to go on walks and just listen to the trees sway in the wind, birds chirp and witness the vibrant colors outside. I find this time sacred and Ella my little sidekick serves as a 20 pound weight which really firmed up my arms 😊. I highly recommend a small pet to better define your biceps  and build cardiovascular endurance– ha-ha. I mean this blog is about getting into shape too and I have to stay on topic…

After the readings, I continued to be open and started studying various aspects of spirituality including mediumship, journeying, healing, and energy work. I actually realized that I had a gift and an interest in clearing energy blockages. I experimented with my friends and/or those brave enough to hop onto my massage table. Just by relaxation techniques, playing chill music and aromatherapy, I collaborate with spirit to clear any impediments, help improve energy flow which in turn enables clients feel better and optimize their attitude and performance. It has been a great unexpected benefit which I have enjoyed and continue to cultivate. I also practice my reiki skills on my dog to help her little legs ache less. I am not sure if it is helping but she will do anything for a cookie – then again wouldn’t we all😊.

This year has really been about exploring other modalities like tarot cards and numerology (just had a great reading – shout out Lauren Drake-https:/ illuminatedlifehealing.com) as she was able to tell me that I possess heavy 3 energy based on my birthday and birth name. And I know this may surprise you, but it means I am open energetically, creative, imaginative, vulnerable and have strong empathy for others. I am intuitive and like to learn – shocking – NOT. I have a child-like optimism and my life lesson is to learn how to effectively express emotions (so I think I have clearly taken that on through my various blogs). Also, I learned I am in my 7^th year,  which is has been one focused on introspection and  transformation. This was another wow, since my writing revolves around a health journey which was apparently destined by the numbers.  I guess there are limitations to our free will and our names do really matter 😊. Therefore, be incredibly careful when you name your child – even a slight spelling change could alter their life’s mission (just kidding – maybe not).

Long story short – I receive affirmation from the universe constantly and all the information lines up – it is crazy. But most of all, it brings comfort and stability to me which has been extremely rewarding and validating. I would encourage YOU to pay attention to small “whispers” that come your way. Are you receiving patterns like repeating numbers, songs that speak to you, coincidences like just thinking of someone and they call, for instance? These are all signs from the universe and not random oopsies. When you tune in and are present, then you notice. Also, it is fun and makes life feel much better and optimistic. So those are my words of wisdom for June/July as I continue on my wellness journey. Oh, by the way, if you read my last post on sleep – I achieved the optimal breathing regularity score with Oura, 3 times which was one of my goals I mentioned in May.  Now you see manifestation in action – Woo Hoo …. Happy 4^th!

One contributing factor to longevity is having a purpose and being able to articulate it as a guiding principle as you live your life. So, as I think about my own health and wellness, I can honestly say I was put on this earth to raise and guide my daughter Isabelle.  According to many ancient cultures such as Native Americans, Africans and Tibetans – souls choose their parents and families much before their conception happens on earth. It brings me comfort and I hope it is true. I would like to dedicate this blog to my beautiful Isabelle who will be graduating from Michigan State University on Saturday.

Isabelle was born in April 2002 via C-section and because I was so sick from the anesthesia, I was conscious just long enough to know she was healthy, had all her fingers and toes and no port wine stains (an irrational fear given to me by my co-worker Sandy). There are pictures from her birthday showing Robin and family members holding Isabelle with loving pride and I was nowhere to be found – ha-ha. When  I awoke the next day, she was brought to me and the nurses shared with glee that Isabelle was the first baby they saw who  drank 2 ounces of formula. Not shocking to me knowing our family history and love for food – she was definitely our kid.

Isabelle was a sweet natured baby who was frequently passed around for cuddling in the family and it made me very happy that there was a lot of love around her.  My first few years were a blur as she was a really bad sleeper and would wake up constantly  in the night wanting her milky milk (which was that gross soy formula that smelled awful). As I went to work feeling like a zombie, she would hang out with her dad and they became besties.  He was a stay at home dad, taking her to all those classes and activities that suburban parents must mandatorily do. Everyone would comment – well we know who her daddy is – since she was the mini version of him. I felt like a surrogate but honestly, she was so darn cute, I was glad that she resembled Robin.

I had an established career that was involved so most of my time with Isabelle was relegated to the weekends. We would go to the zoo every Saturday and had our routine, the outdoor play area, an animal or two, a snack and then a train ride to the front of the zoo. Isabelle was into American Girl, we would play with her dolls, and I would make up voices including relevant dialogue and she would set up scenes and situations to keep it original and fun. I spent a lot of time rocking her to sleep or sitting in her room waiting for her to eventually drift off (which seemed like eternity). I had to figure out how to get out of the chair and walk across the floor without any squeaks or noises that would wake her up. I was convinced I acquired skills to slither out of any situation unheard or noticed from my advanced silent escape methods.

Isabelle and her dad spent most of their time together bonding over geography and world events. They would play with the globe and at an early age, Isabelle loved learning about different people and cultures. She had an odd obsession with North Korea and water buoys  while other kids played soccer. Robin and Isabelle enjoyed history, politics, Legos, Thomas the Train, video games and wrestling – everything I did not like. Although I felt left out at times, I was really grateful of their relationship and closeness. Little did I know that the universe had a bigger plan and it was by design that Robin was meant to be the primary parent at the beginning of her life.

Robin volunteered at Isabelle’s school and guided her through those years. He taught her to drive and how to improve her basketball game. He would be the one to comfort her when she was having a tough day and to drop her off when she went to summer camp. He was also the one who received a call  from camp in the middle of night just because she felt she needed to speak with him. That would be the last conversation she had with her dad. I remember Robin telling me they spoke and had a really nice discussion and I was jealous.

We always try to protect our kids and want them to have the perfect life. I think as a parent, you want them to have it better than you did. I unfortunately could not safe guard her from the most profound loss of our lives.  But as I look at it now with less trauma,  I think this was our path. I was supposed to step in more and we were meant to grow closer. I would not have wished in a million years and would have done anything to prevent this situation but it has truly been a blessing in a weird way for me at least.

Isabelle and I had to get to know each other and my parenting style was much different than her father’s.  She was so like him and we had only a few similarities – it was odd. But as the years went on, we have grown together and enjoy a very tight relationship that I cherish.  I have learned so much from Isabelle and I hope she feels the same. We  had to exercise a lot of resilience, patience and listening to get aligned. Times were not always easy but necessary to develop the bond that we share today.

I am beyond proud of Isabelle. She has always been an excellent student and not once have I needed to get involved to monitor or motivate her to do her work. She is a top student, having been on the deans list every semester at MSU – James Madison College. She is also involved in student organizations and activities from JMC Senate to a founding member of the MSU Weightlifting Club. She has a love for techno music and mixing tunes in a creative way. Often on weekends, she will be dj’ing for a party or off to a concert.

She is ambitious too and passionate about policies that benefit all cultures and those who have been the underserved. She has already traveled the world from trips in the US to Israel, Jordan, Turkey, Oman, Dubai, and another country that I cannot remember the name.  She has studied and taken the time to learn about history, people, and language. She has interned with the State Department and will be heading out to Azerbaijan this summer. She has built an impressive resume at a young age. In addition, she has been resourceful and helping me keep the college expenses affordable by receiving multiple scholarships and awards. She was asked by MSU to represent students at a donor’s engagement for alumni in Arizona. I am sure I have missed many things; the bottom line is this gal has made the most of her college experience. Considering that she lost a full year from Covid and being delayed getting on campus.

Isabelle and I have a mutual love for spas and vacationing together. Some of my fondest memories are of us lounging at the pool, having deep conversations, or working out together. We both enjoy early dining otherwise known as “linner.”  (lunch and dinner) and going to bed early. WE enjoy baking – like perfecting the chocolate chip cookie or cinnamon bun. We also made the most of Covid and being in lockdown, setting up a gym and exercising together following Beach Body on demand classes.

All those accomplishments and interests are great but the area where I am most proud is that she is a very grounded and an empathetic person. She is an attentive friend and girlfriend. She goes out of her way to be there for the people in her life she cares about. Isabelle is humble and doesn’t need to be showy or brag – she is very real. She  is emotionally intelligent and is able to make sound decisions weighing the short and long term impact. On a lighter side,   she calls me every day wanting  to see her puppy – Ella. I find myself succumb to  facetime sessions where the camera is focused on Ella as Isabelle barks out orders to me – scratch her tush, play with her ears …. I feel like I am on that Fans Only page or something. Also, Isabelle likes to go to the beat of her own drum. She has never been interested in fads, following others … she tends to be more a trend spotter – which I think is super cool and love the confidence she exudes.

Anyways as we come to graduation on Saturday, I am really excited about her next phase   and the new experiences and people in her life. I feel it in my bones that Isabelle is going to have some sort of positive effects on the world as she sees that people have more in common than differences. I hope she is the glue that helps us elevate peace and enjoyable lives for everyone. I am excited to visit her be it in Washington DC or some obscure country she finds herself in. I wonder what her future holds and how I may help her navigate those waters. I am just bursting at the seams of all the potential she possesses  – the world is her oyster. Not really sure what that means but I believe it means she has the world by the balls.

So back to purpose and health as I started this blog. I have had meaningful experiences, accomplishments, love, and losses along the way. However, my greatest purpose and fuel comes from my daughter. Being able to ride side saddle and see how her life enfolds with mommy guardrails fills my cup. It gives me a reason to be hopeful, grateful, and engaged for the future. Thank you to my beautiful Isabelle  that provides me meaning and joy each and everyday. Wishing you only the best – may all your dreams come true. Love you to the moon and back. I know I speak for you dad too who is always with us protecting and guiding you – just in a different room.

I have been thinking about people in my life recently and how they enable my wellness journey. According to Google (do you like my referencing methodology??), healthy relationships sow the seeds of well-being. They strengthen your immune system, allow you to live longer, and make you more resilient to stress. Well-being strengthens our relationships. Those who feel healthy, happy, and content in their lives make better friends, coworkers, lovers, and life partners. This definition is spot on and I recognize the power of the community is critical for our existence.

I guess my curiosity about relationships for this post started several weeks ago when Isabelle (my daughter) returned to Michigan State University after having a great spring break. It occurred to me that she would be graduating in less than two months and starting her next phase – which I call adulting (a technical term of course😊). I have not been the kind of mom that wished she stayed young forever… it has been fun watching her get her sea legs and be ready to conquer the world. But yet, I was getting faklempted (Yiddish word for choked up, emotional) as I realized we would both be entering a new chapter of life. She, most likely landing in DC, starting her career and then me … WELL NOT SURE YET and I had not given it much thought until now (yikes). A small panic crept in… as I do not have another kid to obsess over to divert this feeling. This is when having only one child is less than ideal… maybe I can adopt quickly(just kidding – that ship sailed)???However, the whole point of this paragraph, I am admitting, I put a few too many eggs in the MOTHER basket (which I swore to myself I would never do) …and now  I need to branch out to reignite some of my relationships to fill an imminent void. 🕳️

For those that know me, I have always been an introvert and am very satisfied and content just staying home with Ella, my pug (she just gets me – we complete each other – ha). I have also felt fortunate that I have acquired an eclectic group of friends that are scattered across our great nation. Thank goodness for technology these days so when I am feeling lonely, I can just text, jump on Facetime which works out perfectly. I do have a few friends that live close to me  but due to my social laziness, the opportunity to see anyone face to face is rare.

One thing I have noticed about relationships is that I am very much a situational girl. I mean, not all friendships serve the same purpose. I was not overtly conscious of the unique filing system I have created over the last decade. Basically, I bucket my friends/family in several categories to meet my varying personal needs. And as I have gotten into energy healing, I recognize now that my organization methods align with the chakra system (energy force) to satisfy when I have deficiencies in certain areas. As a quick tutorial, we have seven main chakras (spinning energy centers/wheels) located in our bodies running from the tailbone up through the top of the head. The lower chakras represent the experience on earth in in our human bodies and then as energy moves up the spine to our eyes and top of the head – it signifies our connection with spirituality. So, after that not so in depth overview of the chakras, here is my secret filing cabinet that becomes a source of direction for me in a time of need as I decide who would be the perfect friend to call.

• Root/Core ❤️ – This chakra represents safety and stability. When I am feeling shaky in this area, I turn to those who have known me for a long time. These are friendships where we can be completely open and honest with no repercussions. We focus our discussion on the good old days and they are the best for affirmations that everything is going to be ok.
• Sacral/ Pleasure 🧡 – This energy zone is about sensuality and creativity. When I need a little more of that, I am quick to hook up with this crew, the ones that want to go out a whoop it up. You want to rock it out – give these folks a call. Yah baby – let’s party.
• Solar Plexus/ Confidence 💛 – Our energy wheel is about personal power. When I am feeling depleted, I turn to this friend group to build me up. These are my pals who have worked with me, know my capabilities and the business world. They direct me to plan, move forward and stop whining.
• Heart/Love 💚 – This chakra is about self-love and cannot be handled by just anyone. This need is reserved for my boyfriend and family who exude love, compassion, and empathy. These are the folks that you want to spend time with when you f-cked up and need to feel worthy again.
• Throat/Truth 💙 – This area focuses on communication and speaking the truth. When you want to have an honest conversation and get in tune with your center. I have a few friends that are bold and can give it to me straight. Not for the feign of hearts that is for sure.
• Third Eye/Crown 💜 – Last but not least, these chakras are attuned with source, spirits, and the universe. I am happy to report that I also have spiritual friends and we can spend hours together tinkering with meditations, journey and exploring our life purpose. We talk about fairies, spirit animals and guides to manifest our desires.

Now, I must be careful with the mix of my chakra friends because pairing them up could lead to catastrophe (not really – just trying to add drama). G-d forbid,  if I mix my Sacral/Pleasure group with my Throat/Truth friends, there could be a buzz kill moment. Say we are all out being silly and then out of nowhere, my Throat friend drops a reality bomb during the most inopportune moment, wrecking a lighthearted night. In another situation, turning to my Third Eye/Spiritual gals to solve a Root/Safety issue could also lead to frustration. If my car breaks down, I need immediate practical help AND not healing (ha-ha just kidding). Let’s just say, the mix matters such as a cocktail or a finely tuned recipe. Just to be clear, I love my friends – I was just trying to be semi funny cause this post seemed a little too serious. 😊

And then I would be remiss without mentioning Ella, my pug, who has her very own category. Let’s just say she is my bestie. Yes, I am the crazy chick carrying my dog around the neighborhood on a daily basis.  But quite honestly these are my favorite times of all. Ella grounds me and also taps me into the universe. She really enhances my life and provides me unconditional love (although … if I was honest her love is conditional, because she can play me for a cookie and a treat like no one else business). Smart and adorable … a winning combination.🐾

Ok, here is the big wrap-up. As human beings, we are wired to be part of a village. Wellness really involves more than diet, exercise but who you spend your time with … your community. Life is a balancing act that we never quite get perfect. I do know that relationships matter on this journey – you can’t do it alone! And because of all the wonderful people in my life, I feel supported, loved and damn grateful. May I also add that all my friends have an enthusiastic sense of humor and will be curious what category they land in, which I will never reveal!!! It’s all good – peace and love to all!! ✌️& 💕

I have a confession; I am part of the mafia… but not the bad kind where I shake people down for money… it is MORE of a healthy gang, led by our spirited fitness leader Cely. As I have been on the quest for wellness, a big part of my success has involved celyFIT studio where I have danced, lifted weights, stretched, Pilates and the occasional (as in very infrequent) yoga. A big component of staying in balance is exercise and as most of us know, motivation to get in the car and actually make it to a class tends to be the biggest struggle. 🚙However, I am so grateful that I have found this place as I look forward to giving it my all each time through shaking, shimming and hip thrusts. There is a bit of magic here that I have not experienced before and I have been a member of many many exercise clubs and feel confident on this matter. So let me pull back the curtain and share with you the power of celyFIT… and the best part of all is… you too can join if you are in the Metro Detroit area and want to experience it yourself (YES that was a shameless plug – celyfit.com – West Bloomfield, MI – Orchard Lake/Maple – now I am done 😊)

I have always liked music and dance. In the 80’s and 90’s I was very into the aerobic scene and the high spirit associated with this era. I loved leotards, leg warmers and all the bright colors that accompanied the vibe.🌈 Although I could not rock the obscenely high leg and tush exposure, I did my best to subtly put my own twist on that style. However, the aerobic fad changes as most do and it was hard to find a nice replacement in the 21^st century (I guess Jazzercise was around – but seemed geared for a more senior crowd – just did not have enough punch for me). So, to my delight, I saw a Group-On to try out Zumba about five years ago, and I eagerly went for my first class. I remember being greeted by Cely who had an essence about her that was infectious and welcoming. I was confident that I would be decent since I had a long history of aerobics as stated above. The music started, Cely guided the class, counting in a hybrid of Portuguese/English and I did not understand a word she said but I got the general gist (still have that problem today). It was an hour of tremendous energy, samba-like dance moves to cool songs generally sung in another language and I would pick up a word here and there that sounded like English like Zumba, bitch, f-er etc.… 🙊 Needless to say, I sucked bad, guzzled a whole bottle of water, burnt 600+ calories and was absolutely hooked. I had come to realize that Cely had a long standing crew of students who had been with her for years so it was reassuring with a little time and practice… I too would fit in and I did and do now. Although I cannot quite get the moves to look like Cely, my head rolling and hip-hop stances sometimes look like I am stroking out and 911 should be called. 🚑 Yet… the beauty is that I see new people start with the same fear as I had, stepping into a well-choreographed machine, and watching them get better each day, feel more self-assured … like a baby bird getting its confidence to fly.

Although the classes are fun and you always walk away invigorated, the fairy dust of this place is the people and sense of belonging that is created in this environment.🧚 We have all types of folks – it is truly a melting pot of… young, old (I may be pushing this end ☹), one guy🕺, various backgrounds, ethnicities, fitness levels and it just works as everyone is part of a team. In this day and age with all the conflict in the world, it is unique to step into a space where everyone feels like they can be themselves and it is encouraged. All the instructors are part of this family atmosphere and bring their own personalities and spin to the classes, which mixes things up and keeps it spicy.

Ok… back to me, one of the uncomfortable truths about losing weight and wellness is that… 75% is what you put in your mouth.🤬 For a long time, I thought if I just worked out like a maniac, I could maintain a steady weight and it is just not effective (I hate this reality – but I have to be honest). However, exercise is the joy that is brought to you as it affects the chemistry in your body. It releases endorphins, makes you happy, determined and promotes a sense of strength. Exercise helps me solve problems and be more creative… my best ideas have come when I am out on a run … it is my fuel. I will also say, since I have lost weight – it is so doable now. I have more bounce, stamina, feel younger and yes … even a side plank is achievable by me (never could do that before). The thing is having an extra 75 pounds strapped on my back (that is the equivalent to a small annoying person🎒) really built up my endurance and made it more enjoyable as the weight dropped off. Now when I take a walk, I can easily carry my 20 pound pug around as a companion without a thought.

I guess my point to all of this is that exercise was key for my motivation and continues to keep me sane and balanced. I feel indebted to the celyFIT team who always makes me feel part of this community, encouraged, and praised me along this journey. I found a little bit of heaven, through curiosity and a coupon. I also know that there are no coincidences, and it was meant to be part of my story as it enfolds. I hope everyone can find a place as I have, to help you live your joy, become stronger and believe anything is possible… Thank you to my Mafiosa crew 😎and I will end with the only God Father Quote I remember – I thought I was out and they pull me back in. I hope that I was able to get you motivated to jump back into your workout routine and experience the power of movement as it makes a big difference.💯